Our parental values being what they are, call for the building of community - one we call family and we work to help and protect that family. Today we celebrate Fathers (and along with Mothers day) and their role.
I'd like to address our paternal sense in terms of the greater community. I trust you love your family and hope you are celebrated for your loving role. We have similar responsibilities to our fellow humans.
As parents, frequently it is necessary to put ourselves first for survival. "Put on your air mask and then assist the person next to you". It is myopic and tragic, when we put ourselves first to a degree that forget or ignore that we live together. So it goes for society too.
But there are those who feel they can put themselves first all the time - that they don't need to contribute to the greater community, making self interest exclusive, they forget that they live with the support of a whole community, not just a family and not just themselves.
And to those who feel they contribute more than others - this isn't about equality in return. It's not an even trade. Those that can pull heavier loads. It's the ability of the strong to stand up for the weak that made this country, that earned us the statue of liberty and the eloquent poem from Emma Lazarus "“Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free.” - that's not a call for personal gain. It's not for the forwarding of our personal agendas. It's a call for humanity, recognizing our responsibility to help others - to create a world everyone can live in.
Fatherhood (or parenthood in general) was never meant to be a material return. The return comes in the knowledge you helped - you cannot control your child, you can only help aim them in the right direction (to paraphrase a favorite quite from Gibran). So it is with community, with your country. Everyone has to contribute - and it's not equal, but to the best of our ability.
In doing that, we maximize our potential as humans - to love, to give and subsequently let others love and live, without judgement of thier individual values. It is what it means to be a citizen in a democracy.
You contributed positively to the well being of other human lives to the best of your ability. And that's the beauty Parenthood.
Being a father changed my life, especially once I started figuring out how I was truly needed, but it also helped me understand it is a metaphor for growing up and living in this world.
To my child, Jessica Gabriel Tabetha Venar - I love you with all my heart. I'm proud of the human you have become and continue to become.
To my Dad - I love you, miss you and cherish what you taught me, gave to me of yourself.
To Fathers on this day - I recognize your love and efforts - I see it in your children - my fellow human beings and in general, it brings me great hope.
To everyone - we all have the potential to offer each other love and a chance for life and growth. Do it often, without judgement, if you can.
